Eviction Notice for Mr. Finnegan Corliss

Date: June 27, 2010
To: Mr. Finnegan Corliss

I, the Landlord (Mommy) am issuing a 24 day notice for EVICTION. Tenant (baby Finnegan) will have 24 days in which he can either gather his belongings (including placenta, amniotic fluid, and other odds and ends) and promptly vacate the premise(Mommy's uterus), or wait until the final day of July 20th. After which he will be physically removed from the property via induction.

Tenant is being evicted due to breech of contract and destruction of property. Expansions only to the FRONT of the house, within reasonable limits, were discussed. Not only have these limits been exceeded, but additions to the back and sides of the house were also made without approval from the Landlord.

Remodeling and gutting of the home was never approved, nor was changing the initial layout and base structure. Due to the damage by the Tenant, the foundation has been compromised, and the structural integrity of the house is questionable. Additionally the landlord has received numerous complaints about nightly disturbances.

If after 24 days from this day the Tenant doesn’t comply with this notice it will result in an immediate and forceful removal at the discretion of a midwife and the Landlord.


Love, Mommy